Just some thoughts from The Cockpit this morning.
I’m up early again, working on World Domination (😄). I decide to flip back through my notes from the bootcamp I went to in Vegas in October. Here are some things I wrote as I listened to the speakers.
I get to choose how I speak to myself. Have you ever caught yourself driving down the road just ripping into yourself? I heard it said the other day "be careful how you talk to yourself because your body can't tell the difference”. I think there's something to this. I've been catching myself lately, not giving myself slack. Try giving yourself a little bit of grace and understand that Rome wasn't built in a day.
Trusting the process is not enough. You must ATTACK the process. We hear this a lot..."Trust the process". Is there some magical level of success at the end of trusting the process? I don't think so. I think you need to get up every day and go right at it. Take action. I am a “shoot, aim, ready” guy, not a “ready, aim, shoot”, guy. Most times this approach serves me well. I don't wait. I make things happen. When I DO wait, I find that I am disappointed to see an opportunity slip by.
You will never rise above the level of your health. I believe it all starts with your health. It doesn't make sense to be worldly successful in business if you don't have a body to enjoy it with. Do what you need to do on a daily basis to make sure that when you reach your level of success, whatever that is, you actually can enjoy the fruits of your labor.
Narrative determines outcome. We control our own narrative. As I mentioned above, how we speak to ourselves can make a big difference. Rewrite your own narrative if you need to. Say it out loud and listen to what it sounds like. Mine lately has been "I am becoming a sought after Speaker and Coach”. Bold? You’re damn right. If I can't say it out loud and believe it, how in the world would I expect anyone else to?
Feedback - What CHAMPIONS eat for breakfast. I love feedback. To me it's just a faster way to get better. It can be a little bit rough on the ego at times but it's good healthy exercise for the mind to be able to listen to feedback. Take it all in, decide what of it you are going to use to get better and get rid of the rest.
Own your mind, control the controllable. This can be a daily battle, and it should be if you're doing it right. A lot of the guys that I interact with these days start their day with some gratitude, some meditation, or some journaling. I believe that gets your day off on the right foot. My routine seems to be to get in "the cockpit", My corner of the couch where I can reach my coffee, open up the laptop and enjoy my most creative part of the day. It's LITERALLY what I'm doing right now. This sets up my day and gets me off on the right foot.
Start being honest with yourself. I talk a lot about this with my clients. If we are not truthful with ourselves, we can't really be truthful with anyone else. Being transparent and vulnerable is not easy. But it is a necessity when you are looking to develop personally. You have to be brutally honest. It's not always easy to hear but you have to do it if you're going to grow.
Keep the main thing the main thing. This one is hard for me. I like to do a lot of things. Sometimes we need to break it down and just run the lap that we are on. It can be as simple as "what are the five things I need to accomplish today?”. I think it was Tim Grover that said "become a master of the average”. In other words, let's do the basics well.
The PEAK of your productivity is the PEAK of your vulnerability. In cycling, they call this "being on the rivet". Have you ever seen a cyclist going really hard? To be “on the rivet” is an old cycling term meaning giving it full exertion, almost to the point of breaking. It derives from the days when riders used riveted leather saddles, and with intense effort, the hips slide forward, leaving the cyclist's posterior straddling the front rivet of the saddle. This is also where the cyclist is a half step from “blowing up” - being done. Long winded example but you get the drift. We are most vulnerable when we are “on the rivet”. Be careful how much time you spend there.
Be different. Disrupt your industry. I heard marketing/digital media expert Chans Weber say this. So often we operate within the boundaries of what we feel are the norm for our particular business. Don't be afraid to be different. Be disruptive. Shake things up. A lot of great things were accomplished by people that said "I'm not doing it that way”.
What is REQUIRED is not enough. You must do The UNREQUIRED. I hear this one a lot from Ben Newman. Ben is one of my coaches and was most recently named one of the Top 5 Mindset & Performance Coaches in the World by USA Today alongside Ed Mylett, Brendon Burchard, Tim Grover, and Mel Robbins. Ben completes a workout that he calls “The Unrequired” every day - no matter what. It gets done. However, he makes the point that you can't do The Unrequired without first doing The Required. Do what you need to do, but we don't get a medal for that. Then do more.
What is the single most important daily discipline for me, and on a scale of 1-10, how intentional about that have I been over the last 30 days? I also heard this one from Ben. I think if you focused on nothing else each day, but your single, most important daily discipline, you would probably crush life. Asking yourself how committed to that you are on a scale of 1 to 10 only increases the effectiveness. Note, see the above paragraph on being honest with yourself.
I get to design my life. True enough, right? You might think you have limitations on how you can live life, but when it really comes down to it, you are the only one in control. If that's not the case, something major needs to change. You are either in the wrong relationship or you have the wrong people around you. Do an audit, take stock, find out if you are the one that's really in control.
What does my very best look like? How can I add 10%? I like this one. Again, you need to be honest with yourself here. What is your very best? What does 10% more look like? What would it take to add 10%? Write it down. Look at it. Leave it somewhere where you can see it.
Do something every day to connect with someone on a deeper level. This might be as simple as stopping to chat with somebody in the grocery store line. You never know how you can affect someone's day. You can also do this with family. Are people hearing enough from you?
When you love yourself, you give other people permission to love you. I believe you get back more of what you push out. If people see you being kind to yourself and giving yourself grace, you will probably get that in return. If you are always dumping on yourself and hating on yourself, you can expect that in return as well.
Your hard work puts you where your blessings can find you. Funny how that happens. I often say "the harder I work, the luckier I get". But I don't think luck has anything to do with it. I just try to keep on doing good things and son of a gun if good things don't happen. I can't explain it and I'm not gonna try.
People are watching you. I am reminded of this every time I think nobody's reading this stuff or paying attention to my regular posts on social media. Just when I think no one's listening, someone will tap me on the shoulder and say hey, “I really like your stuff” or “keep going”. Many people watch and never comment, but every once in a while, I'll get a private Facebook message from someone and that little bit of fuel keeps me going.
If it doesn’t GROW, it GOES. You could apply this to most anything. Finance, personal relationships, personal disciplines. If it isn't on an upward trajectory, get rid of it. With regard to the personal relationships, that doesn't mean you nuke every relationship that isn't growing but it might mean you put it in a different box for the moment. Pour into the things that are feeding you back.
Grind. But do so with a purpose. How many times if you ask someone how it's going and the reply is "busy busy". Make sure you're "busy" isn't just chaos. Grind with a purpose, grind with the direction, just don't grind aimlessly.
Who has the keys to your heart and shouldn’t? Get rid of the keys and make it a combination. I heard this one from Tim Grover. It was kind of deep. He was asking who we are letting into our lives and how easy are we making it. He encouraged us to change it to a combination instead of a key. Make it harder for people to get into your inner circle. A bit of a pre-qualification process if you will. Know what the criteria is and stick to it. As I've gotten older, I feel like I have begun to do this organically anyway. I have less time and desire for anything that isn't moving the needle for me.
Everything I need is already in me. This is probably one of my favorite “Ben" quotes. I've also heard it said that "sometimes we ask advice about things we already know the answers to". We are smarter than we give ourselves credit for. And we give others too much credit! We know what's best for ourselves, but sometimes we look to others for validation. Stop. Sit down, take a good look at where you are and where do you want to go. Outline the steps to get there. Then break those steps down to daily tasks and disciplines. And then, go forth and conquer.
Thanks for reading, this started out as a short list of things to think about that I was planning to post on my group coaching Facebook Page called The Peak. But I decided to expand on it and share it to a larger audience. I hope you enjoyed it and got something out of it. As always, I am happy to have a discussion with you if you find yourself struggling with life or business. Getting Summit Coaching & Consulting up and running over the past year has been a blast. I am taking on one on one clients as well as membership into our “Peak” group coaching environment. I am also starting another mastermind group in February. I'd love to tell you more about it. If you think it makes sense to have a conversation and you can schedule a call at the link below. Have a great day!!
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